Report

1st at Waterbury day 2; or, Burning Slaver, yup it's still awesome.

I played the same list both days. Incidentally, I played the same list that I
played at SCG Va. The same list I played when I won the RIW power 9 events. And
the same list that I played when Samite Healer and I finished 2nd and 3rd at SCG
Richmond. Burning Slaver, yeah it is still the stone cold nuts.

Here is the lists, again: (just in case you are the one person in Vintage not
familiar with it yet).

Burning Slaver
A deck designed by Brian DeMars

4 Force of Will
4 Mana Drain

4 Thirst for Knowledge
4 Brainstorm

1 Ancestral Recall
1 Echoing Truth
1 Chain of Vapor
1 Time Walk
1 Tinker
1 Mystical Tutor
1 Gifts Ungiven

3 Goblin Welder
1 Gorilla Shaman
1 Burning Wish

1 Yawgmoth's Will
1 Demonic Tutor
1 Vampiric Tutor

1 Duplicant
1 Sundering Titan
1 Mindslaver
1 Tormod's Crypt
1 Crucible of Worlds

1 Tolerian Academy
1 Strip Mine
1 Darksteel Citadel

2 Polluted Delta
2 Flooded Strand
3 Volcanic Island
2 Underground Sea
2 Island
1 Snow Covered Island

1 Black Lotus
1 Sol Ring
1 Mana Crypt
1 Mana Vault
1 Mox Emerald
1 Mox Jet
1 Mox Pearl
1 Mox Ruby
1 Mox Sapphire

SIDEBOARD

1 Red Elemental Blast
1 Pyroblast
3 Duress
1 Shattering Spree
1 Tendrils of Agony
1 Deep Analysis
1 Pyroclasm
1 Solem Similacrum
1 Fire Ice
1 Pyrite Spellbomb
1 Stifle
1 Rack and Ruin
1 Hurkyls Recall


A Waterbury 10 tale.

I decided to make the trip down to Waterbury 10 with former world Champ Mark
Biller (a good friend of mine from Michigan). Ray Rollibard had offered to put
us up for the weekend, and as a result we decided it was both affordable and
opportune to make a trip out to the NE for Waterbury.

I map quest the directions Friday morning and meet up with Windfall and the trip
is on. About forty-five minutes into the trip I notice that we are going to have
to trek through Canada. I ask Mark if he has his birth certificate. He replies
no, but he's never needed it to go through before. So, we decide to run it
anyways. When we get to the boarder, we get stopped at customs. The peace
officer at the boarder is a total nob, and starts questioning us about
everything in the car. Needless to say, five minutes later we, and all of our
bags are out of the car and the search is on. 
"Do you have any firearms or narcotics in the vehicle?"
"No"
"Are you lying to me? We are going to bring out the dogs?"
"No"
"Do you know that it is a felony to lie to a peace officer?"
"Yes"
"Do you mind if we search your car?"
"I understand that I don't really have a choice, so have at it. There are no
drugs or firearms that I am aware of in the car."

So they bring out the dog. And it starts going nuts. It jumps all over our bags,
all over us, and all over the car. (Keep in mind there are no drugs actually
anywhere). And customs decides to search everything. We are detained for two
hours, while they tear through all of our stuff, turn the car inside out, and
force us to under go strip searches. If I never hear the phrase: "Would you
please lift up your scrotum." Again it will never be too soon. "No, no firearms
or drugs under there either, idiots." So after two hours searching we are
finally free to go about our way on to Waterbury. 

My theory that Canada, and that all things Canadian are worthless has once again
been proven in spades. But, alas, I digress.

The trip is long, but we smoke infinite cigarettes listen to lots of good music
and talk about random stuff the whole time. The time passes quickly. We get to
Ray's at about three in the morning, crash, and are up and ready to go the
following morning by eight o'clock.

Waterbury 10 day one: A tale of bad beats.

The venue for the event is very nice. They have a good variety of singles and
the owner seems like a very chill and helpful person. I chat with him for a
while, as Ray sets up for the event and Windfall scurries around trying to pick
up foils for his newly assembled Burning Slaver deck. I have aspirations to play
in the team portion of the event, so I interestedly scan the door every few
minutes checking to see if any good players will come in so I can ask them to
team with me. Finally, Endress walks in; eh, it isn't quite top quality but I
guess he was technically one of the top 15 in Vintage last year... (lol, Jk,
Endress is the stone nutz). So, last year at Waterbury I teamed with Paul
Fishalo and legendary VS systems genius Mike Jacobs (and we finished second on
tie breakers) as team Vintage Avant-Garde. Which had a funny acronym; I'll let
you figure it out. This time we decided to be team "GLOATING ALL STAR HUSTLERZ."


I have a round one bye. So Paul Mastriano and I go for breakfast. And another
one of my theories is proven true. People who work at Dunkin Donuts are slow.
Real, slow. Real, real, slow. After 35 minutes the woman behind the counter
figures out how to toast a bagel, put cream cheese on it, and pour two coffees.
Thanks, idiot. We return and it's time for round 2.

Round Two: Mike Pise, playing Gifts. I enjoyed this match INFY.

Game one is really dumb. 

We both play land go for the first two turns of the game. On turn three he main
phases an Ancestral. I counter it and he proceeds to play, Lotus, Yawgmoth's
Will, Recall land drop from the yard pass. I comment that it "Must be nice to
live in Christmas Land?" He responds by asking what I'm talking about. I EOT
Brainstorm.

I untap and drop Mindslaver with a U floating. He has Force of Will. I nod and
say "Must be." Then cast Ancestral Recall, already knowing that he has another
FOW. It's easy to tell when somebody has the stone nuts. I cast Recall, he
Forces it. "Man! You are so good at this game!" He untaps and passes. I untap
and attempt to cast Yawgmoth's Will. He casts mana Drain. "How lucky!" I scoop,
to save time. 

We chatter back and forth while side boarding.
"It must be nice to just 'have' all of those busted cards, huh?"
"It was"
"You know they are restricted right? You really only have one of each in there?"
"Just one of each."
"Man! And you just drew all of them? That is so lucky!! I wish I could do that
too. Then, maybe I'd be able to win games."
"I won a SCG."
"I've never heard of you, but I don't doubt it. When you can draw cards like
that, you don't even have to be good!"
"I beat you"
"Only one game though, because you were so unreal lucky."

At this point a random nosey self important person who shall remain nameless
butts in and says he is going to call a judge on me for unsportsmanlike conduct
if I continue what I'm doing. I provoke him to do so, as I haven't done anything
that would actually be construed as crossing the line at this point.

Game two we actually get to play. I resolve turn one Duress and he flops his
hand onto the table and points to Force of Will. I'm staring at a hand that
looks like: Force of Will, Mana Drain, Gifts Ungiven, Land, Land, Land, Mox
Emerald. I start writing it down, and he's like "Force of Will?" I reply by
saying, "Your hand isn't so unreal lucky this time, I don't think you can
win..." He shoots the BS right back and says "I don't need to I already beat you
game one, remember? When I smashed you?" And I decide to take the Mana Drain
instead, since I don't have a Force of Will in my hand. On Turn two I play a
Goblin Welder. And on turn three I play Thirst on his end step. He forces it
pitching Gifts. I untap and play another Thirst, and Discard a Slaver. He is
soon slavered and the game over.
Game three: I Drain Reb a Merchant Scroll fairly early and Untap with a Gifts
for Titan and Slaver. However I am short on artifacts and Mana with my Welder
already on the table. I slaver him once and exhaust his hand. I am holding
Yawgmoth's Will but do not have Time Walk. I decide to Weld in the Titan and
Cast Yawgmoth's Will that turn to restore my artifacts count. This way he will
have one turn to rip something before I can beat down with the Titan in turns.
Unfortunately he rips Hurkyl's Recall and uses it in response to me Welding for
Slaver. I Brainstorm Looking for a counterspell but can't find it. With the
Hurkyl's on the stack he asks "Am I so lucky again?" I respond "No, you've
actually played really well; luck has nothing to do with it." He nods, and kind
of understands that the whole "how lucky" stunt and luck talk was just to put
him on tilt. My Titan goes away and I am unable to kill him in the turns because
my Wish is boarded out. I tutor up Tormod's Crypt and put him on a no outer. For
the draw.

I enjoyed this match very much, and appreciated that Mike had the stones to
throw the chatter right back at me. Ie, add Mike Pease to the short list of
Vintage players that I would actually consider 'good' technical players.

In between rounds, the head judge, who is a friend of mine pulls me aside.
"Hey Bri, can I talk to you for a sec?"
"Sure"
"Somebody, who wanted to remain anonymous..."
(I interrupt) "I know who it is."
"Ok, well he said that..."
(I interrupt) "I already know what he said."
"Well, then..."
(I laugh) "Don't worry it won't happen again. The two of us were just messing
around."
"Alright, awesome"

Round 3, Feature Match V. Herbig; subtitled, GORILLA SHAMAN IS GAWD.

Game one:

I'm on the draw. He plays Island and a Mox Jet and passes. I play a Volcanic
Island and a Gorilla Shaman, a Mox of my own and eat his Jet. He Eot
Brainstorms, and apparently finds nothing. I just sort of Goldfish him out,
racing to a Tinker for Slaver-activate.

Game two: He drops multiple first turn moxes and tries for a business spell. I
force it. Untap with Gorilla Shaman, Mox, Sol Ring, Eat your board. It all goes
down hill for him from there. He has no gas, and I quickly tempo him off the
board with my draw and guys. Rough beats.

Round four: (I have no recollection of this round) but, I won.

3-0-1

In between rounds Matt Endress, (to my dismay) drop from the event to play in a
Mana Drain side event, once again crushing my hopes of winning the team event.
Round Five, GAT (the guy who made top eight)

I'm not going to lie to you; this match was awful, and my deck lost me the
match.

Game one: I mulligan down to four.

Tinker
Sapphire
Mana Crypt
Gifts Ungiven

And away weeeeeeeeee Goooooooooooo!

I drop my cards, onto the table and ask "get there?" He has the FOW and it's all
over.

Game two:

I have no idea what happened but I ended up winning the game because of the
gross incompetence of my opponent. He has two Dryads that are both +4 counters
on them and I Tinker for Sundering Titan to block with. He attacks me down to
one life and loses the second Quirion Dryad. If he had just waited for a
Brainstorm he could have won. I eventually hard cast Duplicant and beat him down
with big artifacts.

Game three he has Library, Strip Mine, Wasteland, Wasteland and ENERGY FLUX to
beat my mana. Nice Mana base.

3-1-1

Round six: Ian Degraff playing Pitch Long.

This is more of a joke than a match.

Game one I mulligan down to a hand of five. But, at least this time it has a
mana source. He pretty much just blows me out.

Game two, I keep a hand that looks pretty good, but doesn't work out ever. At
the end of the match Ian pretty much talks shit to me about how I misplayed;
however, I'm pretty sure that he played like a complete buffoon and won simply
because I had stone nothing. I remember the match exactly so you decide who the
idiot is.

I keep my hand of seven.

Mox Jet
Island
Duress
Duress
Stifle
Force of Will
Tinker

That is pretty damned good.

I open up with Island, Jet, and Duress.

He has:

Chain of Vapor
Polluted Delta
Polluted Delta
Dark Ritual
Vampiric Tutor
Xantid Swarm
Mox Jet

I opt to take his Vamp, obv.

He draws for his turn and plays fetch land, and cracks it. I Stifle it. He plays
Jet and passes.

I untap draw Red Elemental Blast, Duress him and take his Chain of Vapor. (He
drew underground sea that turn)

He untaps plays a fetch land cracks it for Bayou and plays a xantid swarm. I
play FOW pitching Tinker on his Xantid Swarm. Then taps his jet to play Mana
Vault.

I untap draw a Goblin Welder that I can't cast and pass. My hand is now REB,
WELDER, and my board, Jet, Island.

He untaps, draws and:
Second main phase he plays Underground sea (onboard misplay #1) Taps Jet for his
Dark Ritual, taps Mana Vault for 3 and casts Grim Tutor with B2 floating and an
untapped Underground Sea and Bayou. He gets Yawgmoth's Will and casts it using
the floating Mana.

His Graveyard is:

Vampiric Tutor
Polluted Delta
Polluted Delta
Dark Ritual
Grim Tutor
Xantid Swarm
Chain of Vapor.

He also has one card in hand.

This is the play he makes.
Xantid Swarm, Vamp, go...

He has blown his Yawgmoth's Will, used a Ritual and a Mana Crypt and a tutor to
cast Vamp. Stone awful. I can't even get over it. (Mainly because after the
match he had the good judgment to, after playing so poorly, criticize my play...
but we will get to that).

I am shocked for two reasons. 1. That was pathetic. 2. I'm probably going to
lose to that garbage. I figure that he has to either of gone for Time Twister or
Tinker (Either way a draw 7, or for Tinker Colossus) which I can beat if I only
draw a Volcanic Island. I draw a second welder on my turn and pass. He draws his
card and casts Time Walk. (This was the card he played before the Will) Untaps
and plays Tinker, and gets a Sundering Titan!!!! Blowing up my Island and his
two lands. If I draw a Volcanic Island in the next two turns I probably win this
game that I (short of his poor playing) can't win. Also, I'd like to point out
that for whatever reason he walked before he played Tinker, which actually gave
me one more turn to draw a volcanic island to save myself. I point all of this
out to him in match as I reveal the Welder and tell him that it is the only play
he could have possibly made to give me a chance of winning the game. Long story
short I don't draw a Volcanic and die.

Here is the play I propose.

Grim Tutor: Tinker: Get Titan. Untap Time Walk: 1 Turn to draw to a Volcanic
Island. Best play. (Also, you leave Yawgmoth's Will in deck).

As I am desideboarding Ian looks over and for some reason takes it upon himself
to point out that "Stifling my fetch land was a really weak play..." I look back
and point out that it was essentially a non can tripping time walk, in a
situation where I had to draw land, and also that I had already Duressed him and
that he had no other Stifle targets in there. It also kept the swarm off of the
table for a turn. He pointed out next that because I played the Stifle I gave
away information about my deck; i.e. he was able to play around Stifle by
Willing for Xantid Swarm and getting Titan instead of Tinker. I then proceed to
point out that it is game three, and that is the only Stifle in my sideboard; so
any playing around Stifle that he did was to my advantage since I didn't have
anymore of them. And that he didn't need to play around Stifle because he had
Xantid Swarm, and that playing Time Walk before Tinker was an awful, awful play
blunder, as was playing a land before he Yawgmoth's Will. He proceeded to
confess that he's more of a 'theorist' than a good player and that he didn't
know what he was getting with the Grim Tutor.

Apparently 'theorist' is codeword for poor technical play skill. The fact that
he criticized my correct playing of an awful hand is what really did it for me.

I drop from the tournament very annoyed.
Windfall ends up finishing 20th. Not a bad placing after a long absence.
Endress scrubbed hard, hard. Tough luck matt.

POST DAY ONE FESTIVITIES:

Jeff Anand shows up!!!!

Congratulations to Jeff for finishing 2nd in World of Warcraft Regional's that
evening. Basically, I put Magic on the back burner and go to Friday's with Jeff
and Mark Biller and play WOW for like two hours. He gives me the cards to put
together my Hunter list to play against his mage list that he finished second
with. I smashed him so good. I was 5-1. Bash, bash, bash with the stompy deck.
He also hooked me up with another Summer Island... That was sweet; I now have
all three artworks.

In other news Mark Biller is astonished that a card as good as Parvink exists. 

I drink five $3 Margaritas and return to the TMD open just in time to watch
Brassy win the whole event. Congrats Andy.

And it's off to day two.

DAY TWO: WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS !!!! WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!!! NO TIME FOR LOSERS
BECAUSE I AM THE CHAMPIONS, DUN DUN, OF WATERBURY DAY TWOOOO!!!

Round one: Gifts. I am the stone nutz.

Game one:

He blows me out. Every single busted card early, multiple FOWs. It is going to
be a long day, or so it would seem.

Game two: He has Library on the play against my weak hand. He activates it
several times. I cast a Brainstorm, and Eot a gifts. The gifts gets countered.
But I have a lot of Mana. He goes really aggressive on my main phase and casts
Intuition for Aks and runs the Aks. I cast a Yawgmoth's Will. My graveyard is
Fetch land, Brainstorm, Brainststorm, Gifts. I cast the Gifts (under Will) for
Tinker, Burning Wish, Time Walk, and Lotus. He gives me Lotus and Tinker. I cast
Tinker, Lotus, and get a Slaver and activate it. I hit the FOW off of
Brainstorm. And untap and wreck him, but forcing him to Merchant Scroll for
Recall targeting me, and Tinker for Crypt on himself. He scoops.

Game three: We had another close one but I managed to squeak a Slaver activation
in to steal the game. The details are fuzzy, but somehow I got there. I just
remember that he got really far ahead and then I was all in on Tinker for Slaver
again.

1-0

Round 2, V. Bomberman

None of these games were really close. I end up beating him two 0 by just
savagely outplaying him with my drains. Both games I drain a main phased spell
with pitch back up and untap with some ridiculous spell.

The highlight of this round was when I set up Mindslaver, I Eot Vamped for Gifts
and set up a the slaver lock by Giftsing on his turn for Citadel, Crucible,
Welder and Academy. He proceeds to break up the pile, and I interrupt him by
saying: no, no, no, you are giving me these two. He asks: "Why?" and I respond
by saying "Because you are Slavered, obv" He says okay, but doesn't scoop. I ask
him if he realizes that he doesn't get to play anymore. He says, yeah I know.
And I ask him if he is a masochist. He promptly scoops.

Round 3, Nick Coss playing Gifts.

Game one, he is on the play. I think that I've got the game with a Yawgmoth's
Will and Force of Will back up as my last three cards. He is tapped out with
four cards. Obviously, they are Force of Will, Force of Will and two blue cards.
Of course, he also top decks Tinker for Colossus. He actually apologizes by
saying "This is so scrubby, I'm really sorry." I laugh, "At least you are aware
of it... Which makes you better than a scrub!" I can't find an answer off the
top and die.

Game two: I open up with Lotus and a Crucible of Worlds. He Forces pitching
Gifts. I play an Island and Recall myself. He immediately frowns and says
"Damnit!" He untaps and plays Island for his own Ancestral Recall. I Force it.
And he is very sad about the way the game has unfolded. He quickly meets his
demise at the hand of a Tinkered out Sundering Titan.

Game three: There was Slavering done, also some scooping. Guess who did which?

I'll give you a hint: He doesn't play Mindslaver.

3-0

Round Five: Gifts again. Keep them coming, and I'll keep beating them back!

Nothing really interesting happened. His hands were bad, and mine were good. I
won't bother typing anything out.

4-0

Round 5; Erik Williams, playing UBW Agro Salvagers.

Game one. This game makes me sad. Because I thought I had it.

The early game unfolded with him having a lot and me having a little. I
eventually set up a turn where I can eot mystical for Recall and use it as bait
to resolve my Yawgmoth's Will. He has two cards and I am almost positive by the
way he is playing that they must be FOW and a blue card. I'm close. Misdirection
and a blue card for my recall. I am completely shocked. "Are you joking me? In
the maindeck? Of your deck? That is soooo Random!!!! What a beating. I Will,
Tutor up a Duplicant for his new Jotun Grunt, exhaust my graveyard so that his
old Jotun Grunt will die, draw some cards, and pass. The turn leaves him with
four cards in hand, a Grunt that will die, and a Trinket Mage in play. However,
he has beaten me down to two. I am also holding Sundering Titan in my hand with
enough Mana in play to cast it if he doesn't play a strip effect. He draws for
the turn. Brainstorm, finds a Wasteland for my Academy. And Drops Bob, Bob, True
Believer. I untap, Burning Wish for Pyroclasm, clear away his four guys and hit
him with my 4/4 Duplicant. He is on a three turn Clock. He untaps and draws
nothing. I untap and draw nothing. He untaps and draws Trinket mage for Aether
Spellbomb. But does not play it. I untap, don't draw a counterspell and lose.
Damn, Misdirection in the main! Unreal.

Game two.

I keep a hand with Island a bunch of gas, no pitch counters, and Ancestral
Recall. 

Island -> Recall. He looks at me surprised. "Really?" "You don't have it." "I
don't, draw your 3." I promptly Tendrils him out on turn three.

Game three:

I mulligan to five. Pyrite Spellbomb, Emerald, Black Lotus, Strip Mine,
Sundering Titan. Yuck. Guess what? I lost.

4-1

Round six: Paul Mastriano playing pitch long.

Game one:

He's on the play. I have FOW.

"Jet? Dark Rit? Cabal Rit? Lotus? Sapphire? Sea? Desire? For, Tendrils,
Misdirection, Hurkyl's, and Brainstorm.

I was hoping that he was trying for Bargain.

Game two.

Epic Epic stuffs.

He has a quick Necropotence and draws down to four and passes. I have Pyrite
Spellbomb in play, so I bomb him Eot for 2. Untap, draw and pass. I have
Volcanic Island and two Islands in play. I mainphase a brainstorm looking for
Fire/Ice. I don't find it. But I think my hand is good.

He goes ape shit nuts on his turn.

And Desires for four. (PS I know he has Tendrils in his hand from a turn one
Duress).

He hits a bunch of Rituals and a Tinker off of the Desire: and casts them and
then tries for a Jar. I Force of Will it. He Forces back. I REB his force. He
casts Tendrils with mana floating, and I have the Stifle. GG.

Game three. I don't know what happened exactly. He cast Time Twister and passed
I tried to hard cast a Slaver. He FOW'd it. He Cast Bargain and drew down to
four life. Tinkered for Jar and passed. I cast Fire Ice, Yawmoth's Will, and
Fire/Ice. FTW.

Apparently he put me on Stifle in hand, and couldn't win through it and passed
when he could have Tinkered for Lotus and Won. Rough beats. But I got there. It
was a very very tough match.

Round Seven ID

TOP EIGHT

Round 1

Crossman playing Pitch.

Game one is really kind of stupid.

I am on the play.
UGS, Ruby, Walk
Untap: Strip Mine, Burning Wish for Duress, Duress.

He FOWs. I drop Tormod's Crypt.

Untaps and does nothing but drop a land.

I untap and play Welder. And Pass with Mana Drain, Sundering Titan, and Gifts in
hand.
He passes

I draw Jet play it and pass. He casts Black Lotus; I respond, by casting Gifts
to bury Black Lotus and Mindslaver. I weld Jet for Lotus and Drain his Lotus. He
short Tendrilses me down to six. I untap, really wanting to draw a mana Source
to hit Slaver. I get COW. So, I Float Red from my ruby, weld in the Jet, tap
Underground Sea and cast COW. Strip Mine his land, replay Strip Mine and Strip
mine his other land.

"I'm playing STAX!"
"I see that, it is quite annoying!"
"I'm annoyed as well!" 

He Mystical's for Yawgmoth's Will and passes.

I replay Strip Mine and pass.
He Draws and passes.
I draw a second Welder and play it.

He Draws and Passes.

I untap and Slaver him, but he doesn't have the Mana to play Yawgmoth's Will.

He has Trickbind in hand. 
I untap and Crypt him Weld in my Black Lotus. Play Sundering Titan and beat him
down with it

Game two:

He doesn't have a very good hand. And gets steam rolled by my the nutz.'

Semis, The rematch V Erik Williams with UBW Agro.

Game one. The details of the early game are blurry to me. All I remember is that
he did not have a Force of Will for my Hard cast Sundering Titan. All of his
lands went away. He also did not have a Wasteland this time to stop my Academy.
I could hold off his attack long enough to play Mindslaver and make his men run
into my Wall of Titan. He scoops.

I board and shuffle up. He jokes that "The only way I can beat DeMars is if he
mulligans down to five again!" I reply "Hoping for your opponent to mulligan is
always a good strategy!"

Of course, he keeps his grip of 7. (I'll try it). I throw my 7 back. I throw my
6 back, and am staring at a hand of 5. "It worked!" says Erik Williams.

However, I like my 5 and think it can win.

I'm looking at

Polluted Delta
Polluted Delta
Mana Drain
Brainstorm
Brainstorm

As long as he doesn't have a Stifle I'm in good shape to fight his slow aggro
deck as long as I hit solid draws. (I.e., not big artifacts and garbage off the
top).

He plays a land and passes. Success! We are getting there.

I draw Volcanic Island, play Delta and Pass. 

He plays a Wasteland and Passes. We did it!

I draw a Black Lotus, play a Delta.

He plays a land and passes. OMG!!?? What is happening?

I draw COW off the top. I move into my second mainphase. He frowns. I play
Crucible of Worlds. To my surprise it goes through. I am soooo lucky!!! I fetch
for Island and play a delta. 

On his turn he plays Nights Whisper and passes. I untap fetch out another Island
draw another Drain and pass.

(I've already won this game, so I will skip the rest of the boring details of
the next 10 turns)

Turn 15: I hard cast Duplicant, it resolves and I imprint his lone Jotun Grunt.
Life totals are me 13 and him 16. I proceed to hard cast Sundering Titan. It
comes in and blows up all of his lands. And one of my Volcanic Islands. I replay
the Volcanic Island for my Crucible of Worlds. I then Cast Goblin Welder and
Pass. He extends the hand.

Finals; Outlaw. 

I sit down and he offers me a prize split.
I reply: "You are ranked 3rd in the Swiss, I was forth. I am going to win this
event one way or another, but I would have no problem splitting the prize
money." 
He says "I understand completely. I scoop." We split, and I win the event.

It was a great event overall.

Thanks to Iamfishman for putting on the event, and for helping Mark and I out so
much.

Props to...

Jeff Anand: and his lengthy conversation about "Skeet, Skeet, Skeet, make the
bed go Squeak, Squeak, Squeak," with the bellhop at the hotel.
Mark Biller: For Driving while I slept.
TK: For introducing himself finally.
Matt Endress and Brian Fisher  for the moral support and listening to my long
sessions of bitching.
Mitch Cowles - for letting me borrow Foil Japanese Pitch Long cards even though
I didn't play it at all.
Phil Williams - for continued use of his Mana Drain. (Since mine got stolen).
Mindslaver - for being the stone nutz.
Mike Pease - for being the stone nutz
"LEEEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOY JENKINS!!!!!!!!!" For smashing Jeff Anand's face.
$3 Margaritas
Ray and friends, obv, obv, obv you guys rule.
Erik Williams - for being so classy.
Roland Chang, it was good to see you again. Enjoy the Foil Jap B ring!

Slops...

The logic "I'm a theorist: So it's okay if I make stupid plays as long as I win
because my opponent is Mana Screwed"
Josh Franklin: Way to get work off newb
Jdizzle: Class if for losers.
Paul Fishalo: YOU PICKED WOW OVER VINTAGE, TREASON, and TREASON>!! I call
shenanigans.
Maindeck Misdirection in Fish.
The phrase "Would you please lift your scrotum" for existing.
CANADA.

Cheers,
FFY