Report

Here's my tourney report of what is becoming one of my favorite decks to play in
T1 - Funker. A bit before I begin - Savannah is about 3 hours SE of Atlanta and
2 hours S of Charleston. I frequently Travel to the T1 in Charleston the first
Saturday of every month. The metagame there is widely varied, and all archetypes
are present.

    However this was the first T1 in Savannah in a looong time, and all the
players with power I knew about. The metagame would be mostly randumbs, with
little knowledge of competitive T1. The primary factor in my victory was the
complete absence of the Parfait, Monoblue & Nullrod. With this knowledge, I knew
I could perform well against all the keeper & aggro out there.  

    I had made minor tweaks the night before when my teammate & buddy got tired
of his deedvoid deck and made reanimator. I realized that the deck I had been
playing up until then had no way to deal with it. So I added a MD Tormod's
Crypt, and took out one of the 2 masticores I replaced with a K.torch.

so here is my Decklist + SB

Mana
4 City of brass
4 Badlands
4 Strips
4 Volcanics
1 Undiscovered
1 Library
1 Academy
7 Solomoxen
1 Manavault
1 Grim Monolith

Artifact Utility

1 Crypt
1 Memory Jar

Brown Creatures:

1 Phyrexian Colossus
1 Processor
1 Juggernaut
1 Karn, Silver Golem
1 Masticore

Red:
1 Gorilla Shaman
4 Welder
3 Covetous Dragon
1 Wheel
1 Kaervek's Torch
2 Fire/Ice

Blue:

1 Tinker
1 Ancestral
1 Mystical Tutor
1 Time Walk
1 Compulsion
1 Timetwister
1 Fact or Fiction

Black:

1 Mind Twist
1 Vampiric Tutor
1 Yawgmoth's Win
1 Demonic Tutor

1 Regrowth
1 Balance

SB:
1 Haunting Echoes (tryin it out)
1 Aura Fracture
1 Gorilla Shaman
4 Pyroblast
1 Urza's Rage (random filler)
2 Viashino Heretic
1 Helix
1 Masticore
1 Zuran Orb
1 Cursed Totem (last minute mistake - this wrecks me too)
1 Winter Orb (great with 2 welders & a mox monkey out)

** 3 Caleb, Chad & Josh tokens (for processor) from "Boy Crazy" a ccg for
teenage girls - these guys owned people all day long. And, as I was hoping, some
scrubs misplayed they were so entranced by their sheer "dreamyness". **



Round 1 : Tyrell (Keeper)
Wow - I couldn't have asked for a better match up. Tyrell is in the military and
showed up at the store about 2 months ago. I took his old deck and took the jank
like mirror and Ivory Tower out & rebuilt it for him. I have played a TON of
games against this guy and win about 75% of them. We draw and my first hand has
no land and I have to paris to 6 - I get 2 off color moxes and decide I'm good.
I go first and play them, and he opens with Tundra, Ruby monkey. Ouch. I draw no
land for 4 turns & he does. (0-1)

game 2 : out processor & Masticore  
         in  Mox Monkey, Aura Fracture

volcanic, badlands + otherstuff in my hand, so I'm good. I open With Volcanic,
Welder - He Forces it out.
he plays tundra, I play badlands, go. He plays city of brass, go. I get a land,
play grim monolith - he drains it & fuels a morphling with it. Ouch, looks like
today wont be my day. 0-1 (0-2)




Round 2: My buddy Todd Lost R1 also, to blue/red jank and he is disgusted. We
draw eachother in this round and he takes me to get my car from his crib - he
just wants to eat and play a lil' warcraft so I get the win and my car.
       1-1 (2-2)




Round 3 : Tyrell's Bud (Reanimator)
Wow - I played a Ton of games against reanimator the night before, so I know
what I need to get and fast. His version is sub-optimal, as I would soon find
out. Game 1 I go first & mulligan to 6, and see the Crypt makes an appearance, I
believe I land, mox, crypt, welder, go. He should have folded. He gets a measly
nether spirit out before getting bashed with 8/8 tokens.(3-2)

Game 2: In 1 Aura Fracture - Out 1 Mox Monkey
I side in my aura fracture because he was discarding Animate deads last game,
and I saw no other recursion. I have a mediocre hand and keep it. He opens with
swamp, ritual, entomb, animate dead->Verdant. I hold on because I might topdeck
the balance. I play a city of brass, he wastes it. I have no other 5c land & no
search, so I fold. Hey - when it works, it works. (3-3)  


Game 3: I get lotus mox land twister early on and manage to draw into the aura
fracture, sealing the game while swinging with fatties. (I was right and saw no
other reanimation besides the enchantments) 2-1 (4-3)




Round 4 : Stephen Penna (Erinegeddon).

There are 3 others doing alright and I care not to play them, and I luckily draw
into Steve. He is playing with and old deck of the tournement organizer's
because we needed at least 12 people to play for a Twister. He Hasn't played in
a while and I take it easy on him, but he is simply outdecked. First game I open
with a land,welder go. He swords 3 of my fatties - causing a little trouble for
me, but I draw a buncha strips and he gets a ernie out amd I get a sole
Phyrexian Colossus out.(thanks for the tech Shane).  (5-3)

Game 2: I get off to a good start, and establish a good mana base, with 6 mana
on the board to his 3 - I memory jar into a maddening 4 consecutive turns. What
fun for him.
I get enough fatties out to put at him at 2 by the end of my turns. His only
hope is a balance, he doesn't get it and the day is mine. 3-1 (6-3)
 By now my deck has drawn quite a few spectators.



Round 5 : Darren (OSE variant)
First round of finals - 2 guys I have never seen, myself and my longtime bud,
Darren. I have played against him since I started (about 1994). I hope I dont
draw him till later, but I have to play him now. At this point, I really don't
care who wins because I have had so much fun.
Derrin plays a funky OSE with copy articact, triskelion & volrath's stronghold
in it. Surprisingly strong though. However Darren insists that we usally 50/50
this matchup, but I think Its closer to 60/40, my favor. I love playing against
this guy - He gets so animated when he is winning and for a wiry guy, he gets
scary when he's losing.
*(Darren, if i missed something correct me and I'll edit it)

 Game 1: I get nothing spectacular and paris into even less. This game goes
quite quickly for me as my lands get wasted and spells get drained as I look to
g.2 as a morphling beats me down. (6-4)      

 Game 2:  I sided in Cursed totem (dumb) & Aura Fracture  & zuran orb.

 This is probably one of the best games I have ever played. I make a HUGE
mistake by playing the Cursed totem second turn. He plays cunning wish for
dismantling blow and I breathe a sigh of relief. He has answers for everything
else early on and whittles away with a factory until I am at 9. I play a
creature to keep him from attacking (Karn, I think), topdeck mind twist then we
play topdeck for a while, then draw Yawgwin with the dankness in my graveyard. I
go banannas on this guy and it is game over in a flash with fatties bashin'
face. Honestly there was more to this game than I just described, but I was so
amped, I couldn't remember. (7-4)


Game 3: I honestly dont remember much of this match -  so  my buddy Todd claims
"he got land screwed and u pummled him with the processor" so I'll take his word
for it. The game was even for a while but I manage to Balance, then waste  his
lands, and play a processor for 8 and deliver the Chad beatdown. I think Derrin
wants to disembowel me right about now. 4-1 (8-4)




Finals Some Guy I have never seen (burn)
SWEET!! I have played burn for about 6 years so this should be quick.

Game 1: I draw into a slow opening hand but manage to play land, mox, sol ring
while getting toasted but eventually covetous dragon shows up to represent for
the red fliers & bash.


Game 2:  Side out Kaervek's Torch
              in Zuran Orb

This game is over before it starts - I get nothing but an early time twister and
Twist & regrow it - giving him the fuel he needs to burn me out before I find
Zuran Orb.


Game 3: I start to get antsy this game - he plays a little burn to my dome but I
manage to zuran orb at 8. He digs for pillage and pillages my orb with my welder
in the graveyard. I sack 3 lands putting me at 14 - we kinda stalemate and I
ancestral into 2 covetous dragons with a bunch mana out - Play one and he
pitches to pyrokinesis + burns it - I just went 3 for 1 !!. I play my other
dragon with 2 cards in his hand and he has 4 lands in play. he fireblasts +
incinerates it after it deals him 6 and is at 5 life with 3 lands & no cards in
hand. I have only a fire/ice in hand. He topdecks a ensnaring bridge, and I get
My Chinese Karn in play. Then it strikes me to tap the bridge and swing for 4,
putting him in goblin/monkey range. But It is a fairly casual tourney and
considering I was out from masques - planeshift it was explained to me that
bridge would be still active - I debated this point, but I wasn't around when
7th came out and only remembered the old school rules. So I was allowed by my
opponent to take it back - what a nice guy !! this proved fatal, because in the
next 2 turns I drew mystical tutor & tutored for the other fire & ice ( I had
sided the torch out - But i knew I had still won.). Then I believe I made the
play of the day - using karn's ablility to animate the bridge (no one remembered
karn could 'cause mine was Chinese) then 3 to the bridge and 1 to my opponent,
putting him at 4 - thien swinging with my karn to drop big silver elbows for the
win.  


Playing this deck has rekindled my faith in how fun Magic can be. I will be
looking into burning wish - time spiral in the deck but I am not sure the
results will be positive.

thanks to Todd, Darren & Tyrell for the testing.
thanks EvilBill for the encouragement
thanks to Chub and Cullen for staying in SC this weekend
and thanks to Shane for your notes & advice